A few days ago, I came across a large snakeskin. Instead of worrying about where the snake was, I grew inquisitive. I visualised the snake shedding its skin. Even though it was a natural process, I imagined it was uncomfortable. I realised a snake sheds its skin so it can grow.
This past year, I’ve been like this snake: shedding my skin so I can grow.
I thought I knew myself. I thought I was unshakable. I believed coming to African Christian College would boost what was already there – the version of me that was comfortable with my thoughts and at ease with life. I trusted myself and the way I moved through the world.
But since arriving, something has shifted.
In the classroom and in the community, I am being shaped. I’m learning to surrender my control, to allow God to be God. I realize nothing belongs to me, and neither do I belong to myself. I should lean not on my own understanding or strength, but on God’s.
Just like I imagine the discomfort of a snake shedding its skin, this process of growth and change has not been uncomfortable. Old patterns die hard, and letting them go feels like losing a part of myself. I grieve this loss.
But as I do, I find comfort and relief.
Through all of this, God has been my comfort, the community – my lecturers, coach, fellow students, staff members, and the children on campus – have been my comfort. Though sometimes I feel alone, a simple gesture from someone reminds me that I am not alone. I am with God through it all.
I am starting to understand that even though this process feels like breaking, it is also a process of becoming. I am learning that growth is not peaceful, and transformation is painful. But even in the discomfort, I am moving toward a stronger, more aware version of myself, and I can’t wait to meet myself after this process.
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